Every week, the nina/o de la semana (kid of the week) usually sends home a sorpresa, a little bag of candies or treats or toys (like from a birthday party). The teacher sends home a count of the number of girls and boys in class for the parents the week before (because usually the sorpresas are gender-specific).
Ellie was the last girl to get picked up today, and there was one girl sorpresa missing. Except, the said nina de la semana was still at school for after-school cheerleading, and she didn't want to give Ellie the last bag. She wanted it for herself.
Ellie was distraught. Heartbroken. These weekly sorpresas are a huge highlight, and this was a Big Deal to her.
It could be that the girl's Mom counted wrong and there weren't enough. There was one left for a boy, but it was for someone who was absent. And Ellie didn't dream of taking the boy one. It could be that her Mom wasn't counting her own daughter in the count, but either way, the girl insisted that she get one, at the expense of Ellie.
Hard life lessons. Lately Ellie has been learning phrases like "hurt feelings" and "selfish" and "not kind," and they definitely helped her express herself today, though most likely it was all just an accident. It's hard to know there was a bag available, just not for Ellie. A missed opportunity for kindness. Her teacher felt horrible, but there was no solving this one.
I sat and hugged her. I let her cry and express herself. I told her how hard it is to be hurt, that it's OK to feel sad and upset and confused. I want her to be able to talk to me and tell me about things, no matter the topic, and it starts with these Little But Actually It's a Really Big Deal Things.
Fortunately, my girls are at the age that a bike ride to the corner store for some helado will heal a lot of wounds. Every few minutes I hear, "Mommy, I'm really sad about the sorpresa," but the sobbing has stopped.
1 comment:
Oh man, I am right there with you Melissa. The other day Gabriel lost a toy down the toilet and of course I want to rush out and buy a replacement right away. But it's another one of those things.
Post a Comment